Argh!

I can’t keep on top of everything, if anyone has any patrticularly nifty ideas aboutvhow I can make more hours in the day, I’d love to hear them…Anyway, while I’m here, listen to these bands:

Natalies Box, One Night Only, The Wombats.

Trust me.

Dan

Back from the dead.

Due to my eternal boredom, I’ve decided to take up blogging again. Although, due to my eternal boredom, it might not be very interesting. OK, I’ll make a list of what’s happened in my absence:

My Love left.

I passed my driving test.

I crashed my car.

Hmm, I’m tired, can’t think of anything else. But if, by some miracle anyone reads this, leave me a message, I’m lonely.

Dan

The holidays!!! Brilliant…isn’t it?

I’m glad to finally be on holiday, but I haven’t really had a break yet. I’m still very busy. I need to meet up with a friend and get hammered, and just veg out for a few days. That would be lovely. But I still have a lot on at the moment, so that will have to wait. I’m so knackered. But I don’t want to sleep. It’s just no fun. I’m really quite happy at the moment, bar one or two things. Still, the weather’s improving, so hopefully my outloo will too. Night, all.

Life in general…

What’s going on? I have so many things that I want. The opposite seems to happen, I mean, honestly when am I going to get dealt something I want? There is a particualr thing actually, and it’s spiralling into a physical need, and it’s something I’ve never experienced. But if you want something that badly surely you’ll get a chance one day? Also my college coursework is totally fucked. I’ve lost one folder, one is totally incomplete and the other one is ok, actually. And I’m under so much pressure. I just want everything to go away. Well nearly everything.

Another day, another tragedy.

Oh wonderful, I woke up ill, tired and annoyed this morning. What have I done to get all of this shit, all at once? I can’t wait for the summer. Hopefully I can put everything behind me and start afresh, but we all know that won’t happen, it can’t happen. I can’t stop thinking about all the things that are haunting me at the moment, and it’s killing me. Sometimes it seems like no-one cares, but then at least someone very close will have what they need to comfort me or cheers me up, or just to even listen to my side of the story.

On another note, I’m behind at college, way behind, so yeah, it’s all good. I need to get out there and meet new people, according to most, but how can you do that when your faith in people in general is at its lowest ebb. I need help, and fast.

This whole betrayal thing is so new to me…

Well, I’ve started blogging again, because I need somewhere to put my thoughts otherwise I think I’ll go insane. I shall stay as I was, and mention no names in derogatory terms, these people will, however, know who they are. But first, I’d like to say thanks to Mark, Dan, Kate and Janine for being there for me through this whole thing. Where do I start, though? How can I describe the massive chain of disappoinmets my life seems to be building for me, every day I get a new one, and a new thing to add to my list of things to worry about. I just want to finish college now so that all that pressure will be off of me but that’s there as well, coupled with everything I now know, and can’t stop thinking about. Am I about to cross a line with my sanity? I hope not, but I feel like it.

Lies, Jealousy, Sleepovers and The Frogs

Well, the Drama Assessment went well. Distinctions all round. Apparently my monologue was really quiet, but have you ever tried to do a loud, suicidal old man voice? Thought not. Still happy, with that, and the sleepover on Saturday night. That was fun – see ‘101 things to do with dru and Lu‘ for the sleepover post. Slightly unhappy about my friends.  Sorry this is really old & late.

Daewoo Lanos

I got a car!!! I’m in love with it!!! It’s a Daewoo Lanos, 1.4l engine, electric sunroof, alarm, immobiliser, steering wheel (luckily!), 5 doors, it’s a gorgeous blue colour, and it had TEN (repeat, 10!) CD multichanger. Oh, and I do not love it more than my girlfriend. Happy, love?

University Blues

I want to go. I really want to go to Uni. So bloody expensive though…I went to a Uni fair yesterday, and came away with about 20 prospectuses (about the size of A novel per prospectus). I’ve spent several hours looking through and narrowed it down to 6. It’s too expensive, but I’m going. Student debt, maybe. But I’m doing Law. Roll on 6 figure salaries. or at least sortof £40k by the time I’m 30. Great stuff. I’m so excited, I’m going to loads of open days . All over the country. How immense.

 It’s not all happy though. I want to be in love, and in love. Again. I think I might be, kinda, though to people who know me well, that’s not new news. It’s been a long obsession. I want to pour my heart out, but if someone read it all, I’d probably destroy my life, so I’ll keep everything bottled.

 You know, I want to leave for Uni now. I want the experience. I want to be with someone I know there though, but not in their course. A whole fresh start (not leaving behind my best friends though, who, incidentally are too good for me). Can’t wait.

Self-confidence on the Fairway fromt is at an all time low. Cos I know people bitch about me, but they’re all I have. I hate it. There are some genuine people out there, and those are fantastic. I’ve had enough of this for tonight now. Goodnight all.

Cynicism is the new Rock ‘n’ Roll…

Dontcha hate up and down days, when the down is the last part? I’ll start in chronological order though, with the happiness. It’s been a good day, really, I recorded a new song, and I’m delighted with it. But it’s easy to get dejected. I need to get out more but my friends are all so fucking lazy sometimes. I’m going to bed. Night.